


Once Upon a Time

by layladeekronin



Category: Breaking Bad
Genre: Budding Relationship, M/M, Wall-E - Freeform, What's even going on?, sorry i was drunk
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-27
Updated: 2020-03-27
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:07:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23338891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/layladeekronin/pseuds/layladeekronin
Summary: My roommate and I decided to drunk co-write a Badger/ Skinny Pete fanfic, and this is the product. Hope you enjoy.
Relationships: Brandon "Badger" Mayhew/Skinny Pete
Kudos: 5





	Once Upon a Time

About the author:LACROSSE & SWIMMMMM!!!!!!

Prologue: this is the Breaking Bad universe so there’s meth and stuff (which doesnt exist in real life)

Introduction: Welcome to the crib

“Hi I am a little bitch” walter white said or at least badger said in a terrible walter white impression. 

“Oh oh I know,” Skinny Pete got up to Say, “You’re Walter White!”

“Yeah man! How are you so good at this game. It’s not fair,” Badger continued. 

The pair sat in their almost-empty living room, which contained only bean bags and a very large “bitchin” TV.

It was the fist day of Skinny Pete and Badger living in the same house. They had decided to move in together after the word on the street said Jesse moved to Alaska. 

“Alight. My turn, my turn,” Skinny pete siad. “Hi. Yo yo yo. 148-3 to the 3 to the 6 to the 9, representing the ABQ, what up, biatch?!”

Badger nearly falls off of the bean bag he’s wheezing so hard. “ That’s sch a good impression”

Skinny Pete: Yo thanks homie. But truth be told man, i miss jesse. 

Badger: I feel that man. I miss him too...  
They both looked solemnly at the ground.

(2 weeks later)

Badger: What if we like… put a shot in white claw?

Skinny Pete: THose are BITCH drinks man. What are you doing drinking white claws like theyre good???

Badger: Excuse me?? They are a low calorie alternative man!!!!! Only 100 cals!!! Come on. You KNOW how ive been watching my weight recently.

Skinny PeteYo man that’s so whack really??? I didnt mean it man, you drink whatever you want. Pass the meth. That aint got no calories.

Badger: Yo man. It hella sucks we’ve had to buy our own meth since jesse left us...

Skinny Pete: Yeah.. it’s just the two of us now … haha

Badger: Yeaah .... I mean that isn’t a bad thing bro like ur really cool n shit

Skinny Pete blushed and deflected with: “I’m gonna need some more FUEL” and came back carrying 2 bags of Doritos, the cool ranch version of course. Badger immediately ripped open the bag in the worst way possible, right down the front so that there was no semblance of closing it. 

“Broooooo ur the best,” he said as he shoved a handful of chips into his mouth.

Skinny Pete changed the channel to Mythbusters.

Badger: hang on.. Ive seen this one. They totally blow up this dude’s head!!!

Skinny Pete: yo I really dont think thats how this show goes yo. Like im pretty sure buster is like shot into the air or sum shit. Ain’t this the one where they see if some like chemical or shit will burn through the bottom of a bathtub

Badger: yoo that totally reminds me of what happened with jesse… like.. Weird.

Skinny Pete: oh shit man that’s so right, that’s like some weird shit or something... almost like they know what he did *side eye emoji*

Badger: woah…. Anyway. Man i dont know if i have the mental capacity or whateer to keep up with the scientifical show its like all scientificial shit. It make me feel to edumacated watching it *shudder*

Skinny Pete: Yeah man, im gonna go to bed already.

Badger: already?? It’s only 3:30am!! When did you become such an old lady

Skinny Pete looked very upset. “Exucse me for caring about my health n shit!z”

Badger: yo sorry man. I didn’t mean anything by it. Like u can go to bed whenever you want or whatever .... I just like hanging out with you yo

Skinny Pete looked much happier to hear that: “We can hang tomorrow bro. Promise”

(next day)

Badger wakes up to the sun htting himm in the eyes and he tries to roll over, but theres something preventing him from doinng so. His eyes shoot open and he looks behind him ... and there’s skinny pete acting as the big sppon in bed

Skinny pete: sorry bro, i didnt mean to wake you up or nothing. I dont really know how i ended up here, i guess i went too far last night or sleepwalked or some shit. Ill get out of your way.

Badger: what do you mean yo what shit even happened last night

Skinny Pete: idk bro, i guess i havent been with anyone in a while and was feeling kinda lonely.

Badger: yo man u know I’m always here for you n shit. You could’ve talked to me about whatever

Skinny Pete: aw thanks bro. I appreciate you, youve always been a real one. Anyway, better start slingin early to make mad stacks today.

(he leaves)  
[exit skinny pete]

Badger bust through the door, “yo man look what I found on the ground todayy” 

Skinny Pete looked up from the bean bag he was lounging on and saw Badger standing with two large foam hands in the rock n roll sign looking at him. “Yo that’s awesome dude. The sign for rock n roll my dude”

Badger banged his head forward and backwards with his tongue out like the rockstars you see on stage. “Yo yo yo ... wait isn’t this also the sign language for love???”

Skinny Pete: hmm… i dont know bro. Could be, could be. Anyway, what do you wanna do? I promised to hang with you today, cause like there isnt anything better i could be doin anyway haha

Badger: lol i dont man what do you want to do?

Skinny Pete: idk man, want to smoke something up? I could really take the edge off right now

Badger: yo is something bothering you man?

Skinny Pete: *blushes* nah man i’m all good

Badger: yo man you sure?? I get what it’s like to have an off day man. We can talk about it. You know I’m always here for you yo

Skinny pete: yo man we should just pick a movie and watch some shit. That’s what would really make me feel better man.

Badger: yo I got you man. Let’s flip on disney channel my dude

Badger proceeds to turn on Disney channel and conveniently Wall-E was on. 

Skinny Pete: “yo man you know me so well,” skinny pete said as he settled down into the bean bag chair. 

They both settled in to watch the movie unfurl. As they got to the scene where Wall-E and Eva were dancing in space. 

Skinny Pete: yo man that’s like you and me. You’re the dingy robot left on earth and I’m the new fancy one sent to earth recently. 

Badger couldnt help but feel excitement as Skinny Pete said those words. Was he feeling something more than friendship?

Badger settled back into his bean bag. Was he a little closer to Skinny Pete than before, well no one was there to tell but the two of them. 

Skinny Pete noticed that Badger was sitting a little closer than before. He didn’t mind. 

As the end of the movie comes about, Skinny Pete looks over and sees tears gathering in the corner of badgers eyes. 

Skinny Pete: yo are you really getting emotionally worked upabout two robots.

Badger: yo man this is a true naravtive of true fucking love. Look at them they’ve been trough all this hardship together. And now they’ve managed to succeed in both of their prim objectives and stay together. What more can you ask for.

Skinny Pete: i guess man ... wait ... Is that low key like us???

Badger: what do you mean bro??

Skinny pete: well like our ‘main objectives’ or whatever were to like make money and smoke meth, and like here we are ... still chilling after we have made our objectives or whatever

Badger: yo man I guess you’re right ... I guess all that’s left is for us to fall in love hahaha

Skinny Pete: 😳😳

Badger: yo man you alright? You look like you’ve seen a ghost or some shit. 

Skinny Pete: yeah haha, I might try to go to bed again. Dont follow me or nothin haha 😳 

Badger: hahaha why would I follow you bro like no homo or nothin

Skinny Pete: haha of course not. 

(next day) Skinny Pete and Badger get super drunk. Badger is lying across Skinny Pete on one of the bean bags.

Badger: like yo you know I’ll always be here for you bro ... like I really care for you bro ...

Skinny: Yeah of course bro. Im here for you too. I love you man. 😳

Badger: lol thanks man. Love you too. 

Badger continues watching the show on the tv not even realizing what he said. 

Skinny Pete runs his hand through Badger’s messy hair and sighs internally.


End file.
